Having two nights in Kefalonia, I wanted to do something fun and adventurous. One of my favorite things to do is to travel. One of my least favorite things to do is to tour. In my mind they are so very different. I was under the impression we were going to go rowing in underground lakes, hiking into old caves, and visit some famous beaches on the island. I signed up for the wrong one.
The tour company picked me up by 9:00 am. Carol, our tour guide, started talking about the area. After about two minutes on the bus, I was getting the feeling that I wasn’t in the right place. I was where I signed up to be, just not where I wanted to be.
Once Carol started, she never stopped talking. Is it bad manors to ask your tour guide to stop talking? Yea, I thought so too. She was just giving me a headache. I felt like I was in the Charley Brown Comic. Carol was the teacher saying, “Waaaa Waaaa Waaaa.” I learned so many things that I didn’t want to know. No, I don’t need to know the acidity level of olives to make olive oil taste good. It’s where you pick them from the island, when you pick them, how you pick them, and what type of olive they are that determines the 0-1% acidity level. If it wasn’t for Carol I would never know what an Oleander is. Oh wait, weren’t those in my back yard growing up? I was particularly stunned when the topic of architecture came about. I know not everyone studies it, but I am hoping we all understand basic concepts. “This would be a typical home. Buildings like this in the area are where people around here live. They have bedrooms and bathrooms.” Talking as if were at a zoo, looking through the cages. “….in the circumference of the town, you know the ‘around’ part” It was like I went back to third grade with a horrible history teacher(and I loved my third grade teacher!)
I know it all sounds really mean, me picking on poor Carol, and her not being able to defend herself. But, you didn’t hear her talk. Okay. Okay. Okay. Have you ever been so excited about something you couldn’t wait for it to happen? Then, as it turns out, it isn’t anything like how you planned? THAT was my day.
All of that being said, I was carted around Kefalonia. We stopped at all the tourist sites to take pictures. Thirty minutes here, for an hour drive there, ten minutes here, for a twenty minute drive there—was my day. ‘Rowing in underground lakes’ was a 10 minute adventure where we weren’t allowed to row. When she said, ‘Hiking into old caves’, it meant 4 flights of stairs into an old cave. Stopping to take pictures of the beach, or allowing an hour to get in qualified as ‘visiting famous beaches’.
I wanted an adventure and I got the day in the life of a Tourist.
On a side note, I am sitting on the patio of my hotel room. Its mid morning and the crickets have not stopped sense I got here… They are sooooooooooooooo loud. Its insane! Just a thought.
I am not an author. To be quite honest, I always hated English class. I write so I may share my experiences and remember the man I met on a bus who treated me to dinner with his family, paying and booking a hotel only to find out its out of business, fake crying in the Athens airport to get a ticket home, or remember the strangers who looked out for me on a bus. Some live, experience, and are fulfilled by what’s in their backyards. I find there is something truly exhilarating about cramming as many possessions into a bag as possible, only to complain you brought too many. This is my life out of a suitcase, hope you enjoy.